So...

Yep. Still on my diet. And still want this ice cream cake. Every. Single. Day. I think I might be a little bit in love with it.

Harper can't have ice cream cake fantasies, so instead is in love with dogs. Every animal that doesn't fly is a "gog" (if it flies, it's a "guck"). I was watching Doctor Who last night and this group of huge green aliens ran across the screen chasing Doctor Who and Rose and Harper yelled "Bad gog! Bad gog!" Aliens? Gogs.

Her other new trick is smacking you and saying, "Ow! Go!" She's a feisty little thing. Good think she's so cute. ;)

She finished 164th in that photo contest. If you voted for her, thanks. Even though she didn't win, we know she's the #1 cutest baby in the universe. Because she is.

Diets and Musicals

So we're 3 weeks into our Biggest Loser contest at work and I'm down 6 pounds so far! Yay! It's exciting to see the progress. I'm also seeing a definite increase in Wii Fit stamina. And, I want to eat an entire ice cream cake. An ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins with peanut butter & chocolate ice cream and chocolate cake. Not that I've put much thought into it or anything... Last night I had a dream that Chalena gave me a giant candy bar and it was so good. Maybe tonight I can have a dream ice cream cake...

So the other day at work a coworker asked me what musical I would want to see on Broadway. Which really stumped me because the answer is, of course, "all of them". I want to see "The Book of Mormon" and "Wicked" and "Les Mis" and "Woman in White" and "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" and "25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee" and "Phantom". And isn't Daniel Radcliffe on Broadway in "How to Succeed in Business Without Even Trying"? Add that to my list. And "Rent", of course. And if "Annie" and "Grease" are still running I should see them for old times sake... So I probably should avoid New York until I win the lottery because I hear Broadway isn't cheap. How would I choose one?!

Cutest baby and weekend shenanigans!

Firstly, I am such a proud mama! Harper is a weekly finalist in the Parents Magazine cover photo contest! They collect votes for the weekly finalists all week (hence "weekly" and then the 10 weekly winners are eligible to win a $10,000, a trip to New York and a cover shoot for Parents! If you want to vote (and you do... every day until the 28th), just go here: http://photos.parents.com/category/vote/photo/871774. I know she's the cutest baby ever, but it's nice when other (not biased) people do, too!

Secondly, I'm obviously still here and survived the rapture. How embarrased is that guy, huh? Probably not too embarrassed because he has millions of dollars that he raised to spread the word and can now retire to some tropical island where they are unaware of his prediction. But still, maybe a little embarrased.

How did I spend my Rapture day? I had an Old Navy Spring Accessories party hosted by CrowdTap! Yep, cause free stuff from the internet. A few girls came over dressed in different "themes" and we accessorized them up! Here are the pictures:

Here are all the accessories they sent me on my cute coffee table. The weird things on the table corners are stickers from the padded corner guards that Harper removed and chewed on. They sent a straw fedora (complete with adorable flower), cute blue sunglasses, an awesome yellow purse, and 2 chic scarves. They also sent 5 "Recycle Your Heart Out" totes as party favors!

Here's cute Krista in her "Picnic in the Park" outfit. She accessorized her outfit with the black & white scarf, blue sunglasses and tote filled with ball-pit balls. Cause no picnic is complete with a ball pit.

Chalena came impecably dressed for a Backyard BBQ! She added the straw fedora, blue sunglasses, yellow purse and pink floral scarf. She looks ready to eat grilled goodies and drink beer!

Sarah originally came dressed for a Friday at the Office, but decided she'd rather be dressed as an American tourist in Japan! She's protected from Japan's rising sun with the straw fedora and blue sunglasses. Mt. Fuji will not give her a chill while she's wearing the black & white scarf. And she can fill the yellow purse will all sorts of fun Hello Kitty souveniers!

I am ready for my beach vacation (which I'm actually taking in August, so it was true-to-life). I'm wearing the straw fedora (so I stay pasty white), blue sunglasses, yellow purse (to hold all my wax museum gift shop prizes) and cutest baby ever. :)

Our 6th guest was "enraptured" with Old Navy. Or, at least she was Raptured... the Old Navy accessories stayed here, which is too bad because they're heavenly! (Thanks so much... I'll be here all week... tip your waitress).

OFFICIAL Zombiegeddon Instructions

They aren't very thorough, but the CDC has published instructions of what to do in the event of Zombie outbreak. You can read it here: httpL//j.mp/kKkyR3

It's nice to know that the government is at least a little prepared for zombiegeddon. Most of their tips are like "Haha. Zombies will never happen. Here's what to do if there's an earthquake..." Because you know what you DON'T want to do if your neighbors are trying to eat you? Meet your family by the mailbox. That just makes you a buffet. It is smart, however, to stock up on food and water. Or do what Travis plans to, which is kill the zombie neighbors that have stockpiles and steal their food.

And maybe start doing that now, because apparently the Rapture is Saturday and the dead rising from their graves is a big part of it. I feel bad for my sister Alicen because her birthday is Saturday. But she'll probably get to be Raptured and what a cool place to have your birthday party. "Hey, Alicen, where is your party this year?" "Oh, you know... heaven."

So, if the internet still exists Saturday night, I'll blog about all the cool free stuff I've been getting via the internet. I might even tell you how I'm getting it. I'm torn because if I divulge all my secrets that's less free stuff for me; but I'll think about it. If the internet does NOT exist and some of your neighbors disappear, steal their food and cool stuff and meet us at my house.

Our House... is a very, very, very weird house.

Overheard at our house:
"Harper, I don't want you to play with a can. That seems dangerous. ... Want an axe?"

Yeah, that just happened.

The Pros and Cons of Language

What a week! Tessa's oldest daughter McKya was in the hospital, the poor little thing. I went to visit her and she was so sad and hilarious. The nurses had put an arm cover over her IV so she didn't pull it out and she didn't like it because it was decorated with sea animals wearing swimming goggles. She said that sea animals live in the ocean and don't need to wear goggles over their eyes. She's pretty sharp for 4. That's my kind of kid. :)

We have been teaching Harper some sign language so that she can use it at meals, mostly. She knows "more", "eat" and "all done". She uses it all the time. For example, tonight I was trying to rock her to sleep and she stood up on my lap and signed "all done" and smiled at me. It was so cute that I let her play for another 30 minutes. Here's hoping she sleeps in a little tomorrow...

Sleep

Harper hates sleep. It interferes with her climbing and falling time. It prevents her from being super hilarious and adorable (she's still adorable while asleep, but the hilarity part is complicated). And it is hard to talk on the phone to imaginary dogs (complete with barking) when catching some z's. Unless she dreams about dog phone calls. I don't know her life. Anyway, I don't really notice that this cute little sleep-deprivation experiment is affecting my mental capacity until things that I can normally figure out are completely impossible. Like this blog, for example. Earlier today I tried to post a blog post about Mother's Day and diets. Here is a brief synopsis: "Happy Mother's Day! (humorous picture) I am on a diet but love candy! (a different humorous picture)". Here is what posted: (humorous picture) (a different humorous picture) then half a sentence. And I had no clue how to fix it, so I deleted it. Rest assured that it was awesome. And mentioned Alien and the cheesecake/feet connection. You'll have to piece together the rest, because I'm scared to try to post it again.

The Future is... Now!!!

Testing... Testing... If you are reading this, my experiment worked and I am blogging from... THE FUTURE!!! Okay, really I'm blogging from my phone because WE LIVE IN THE FUTURE! I understand the laws of physics and quantum mechanics and logic and that I'm blogging from the present; I'm talking about the "future" we thought about when we were kids. If Marty McFly could see us now, he'd be super impressed. We can do everything from our phones. We pay for things with cards. We can watch movies in the backseat of our cars, which can't fly, but can sync to our iTunes. We can chat via video with people on the other side of the world. This is nearly Jetsons time. And it is awesome!

Whew! Sorry to nerd out so hard and ramble. Harper is currently boycotting sleep and we started the Biggest Loser at work on Wednesday so I'm feeling a little punch drunk. And being punch drunk makes me ramble and also inspires me to invent awesome dance moves at work. It's a double-sided coin. Which all coins are. Double-sided, I mean.

Okay. I'll stop now. Really.

Disaster Plans

All of these natural disasters on the news have Quinn and I talking about our family disaster plans quite often. We have a tornado plan (filling up the sink in the downstairs bathroom and sitting in the laundry room because it doesn't have windows), earthquake plan (getting in a doorframe or under a sturdy piece of furniture), fire plan (depending on where we are in the house, we know where to go) and zombie plan. Of course we have a zombie plan (I'm not going to share the zombie plan unless you need help with your own zombie plan... if you become a zombie and still retain some memory, I don't want you to know where to find us). I think all of these plans are important (even the ones that are fantasy) because they make Quinn feel like she has a little bit of control in case of disaster. Also, they're fun to practice. :) Do you have disaster plans for your family?

Best business idea ever & Osama musings

I've been having a Scentsy basket party and one of my co-workers asked if they had a bacon-scented bar that would go in a pig-shaped warmer. They don't, but they should. Sarah-Beth and I then thought of a lot of non-traditional Scentsy bars & warmers that they should carry. Scentsy is apparently not interested in carrying our ideas, so we are going to start an offshoot company called "Offensive Scents". We are totally open to start-up funds, so let me know if you want to invest. The monetary returns will probably be good and the "awesome" returns will be epic.

Also, having a baby has ruined me emotionally. I've always been pretty sensitive, but this morning I woke up sad for Osama's family. Don't get me wrong; I am glad that he is unable to plan any more terrorism, but I just think about if Harper was a mass-murderer and how much I would still love her and Osama's family is not only grieving, but watching footage of people lighting fireworks. Hopefully Harper doesn't become a terrorist mass-murderer so I never have to worry about that.